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The finale of the year, the end of a month of touring the UK and a wave event at a location renowned for massive waves: Rhosneigr. The country had spent the autumn under constant attack from wreckless, damaging, tortuous, winds but:

"Typically with the wave championships looming, the forecast was appalling."

Perhaps it was fate that the wind came from the north west with small waves producing conditions more akin to the south coast than Rhossy. After all, Pozo PWA superstar and port tack specialist, Ben Proffit, was injured and unable to compete. He would have been a favourite in classic Rhosneigr conditions, but in north westerly, starboard tack, anything could happen.

Thursday: The Only Proper Day of Wind.

Sunny, chilly, small waves and not even that windy. Most of the 20 strong Pro fleet were on 5.8m sails and their biggest wave boards. The waves were rideable, the jumping was fun, but really we all knew how much better Rhosneigr could be. Andy King was easily the best at jumping in these light conditions, landing backloops off chop. But he did opt to use a 100 litre freestyle board which was not the best for wave riding. Throughout the day Chris Audsley and John Skye stood out, as you would expect, and were loving the south coast conditions. The amount of consistently landed back loops was amazingly high considering the average conditions.


Andy Heighton Jackson, first time competing in the Pro's

 
Oh Chris, you tweak so hard!

View from the Dunes


Mr. Consistent lands another backloop
     

Jamie Hancock: unlucky this year with injury but definately a name to look out for next time...
 

Instantly the stakes were high.

Early on in the third round Jamie Hancock, Matt Pearch and Chris Audsley met in an outstanding play off. Jamie opened superbly with a really clean back loop. He is ripping on his new Gaastra and Tabou kit, but an injured ankle was holding him back quite noticeably. Immediately, Matt and Chris answered with backloops. With only one wave to count and two jumps, it really was a case of trying to get as much height as possible on the big kit. The three matched each other move for move. It was probably down to wave selection, but in the end it was Chris and Matt advancing, leaving out the ever improving young Jamie.

The Funsport flag was kept flying to the very end by team riders Greg Martin and Phil Horrocks, with Phil staying into the very end with some pretty special wave riding considering the mucky conditions.



Where's Terry Luxton gone?


IT'S ALL TOO CONFUSING!!


Confusion in the heats, confusion in the judges van, confusion on the beach. Somehow there was an early clash between the top two seeds: Andy King and John Skye. How this happened I do not know, but next years system is being changed to make sure such mistakes don't happen again. Andy had already disposed of his brother, Steve King, and Steve Thorpe (placed 5th and 4th last year). But despite doing perhaps 10 high scoring jumps from one-handed ninja kicks, one-handed backies and planing forwards, Andy failed to progress. Maybe his wave riding let him down in the mush, but he was bitterly disappointed. But to be fair, Phil Horrocks managed to pull off a 'TAKA'; an amazing move that scored him the highest wave of the heat to dispose of Andy.

Phil Horrock's charge had landed him a place in the final alongside Chris Audsley, John Skye (typically) and perhaps surprisingly Terry Luxton, who had been sneaking through his heats quite comfortably. The tide was now out, and the conditions really had deteriotated. Still, a ninja kick by Audsley and the best wave of the heat by far saw a first place for the south coast boy.

Right, that is enough of that. Now for something completely different...

MEET RUSS TETLOW, MASTERS CHAMP: MAD as a HATTER, totally BONKERS...

Russ: Thanks Clyde you GIT, enough of that rubbish, this is how it really was:
 
The Wave competition at Rhosneigr was quite an experience, and not one you ought to miss if ever you get the chance.  At 40 years old it was my introduction to competition and I was throwing myself in at the deep end by entering the Pro Fleet!  The Best of British, not an undertaking to be taken lightly, these boys and girls are seriously good.  

Usually, competing of any sort just does not appeal but I was now faced with a challenge, and I was looking forward to seeing where I stood in the pecking order. Only problem was, I was supposed to be entering a wave competition and my wave riding definately lacked finesse!  I have been trying and trying, but nothing ........... not good!  (Dave Buckland, the event organiser and potentially one of my competitors, told me he would let me know the secrets of wave riding, AFTER the competition. Bar-steward!)

However, three weeks before the contest, in port tack winds, all of a sudden I was riding three or four turns, gybing on the face of a wave on the outside and then front-side riding it into the beach. I was really relieved, but phew, that was cutting things a little short. However, that was no help as on the only day of competition the wind was blowing from the other blooming direction.

But that was the least of my worries. Please note, if YOU should decide to enter one of these competitions, get someone to explain how the flags work BEFORE the event. I am thick or what? I lost a minute on both my heats because I came in when the green flag was lowered. The heats were only six minutes long and there is still a minute to go once the green flag comes down. Doh! 

Thursday 04 Nov. Wave Competition.  

Russ: Morning arrives and there is not a lot of wind. I'm on a 6.4m sail on a custom wave, 105 litre board. It's cross-on from the right at about 18-20mph.  My first heat was rubbish, I don't think I even got my fin out of the water. I thought that that was the end of my competition, but another heat some time later and a quick board change saw a couple of rotations front and back and the occasional arse wiggle on one or two waves, which meant I clocked up at least a couple of points. Didn't get me through though.

The Pro's on the other hand put on a real nice show: some wicked backies, pushies and I think I even saw a goita off the lip from local boy Phil Horrocks

"Considering the iffy conditions, them boys really know how to rip. The ladies are hot too."

Saturday 06 Nov. I win the Expression Session! 

Russ: A bit of sailing backwards, a few hellyplops, a bit of a wave wiggle and I won!

Oh, did I mention that the Pro's had decided to express themselves at the local Cafe (nursing their hangovers) and forgot to show!  UKWA Boss (Judge Dredd aka Trevor Funnell) was not best pleased, and all the Pros will be paying a fine before they are allowed to enter their next contest.

 

 



Funsport team rider Greg Martin goes end over end...


Super twisted, 3rd placed Phil Horrocks


Louise Emery (Editor) can only look on as Camilla French jumps into 3rd spot


Britains "Most Extreme" somersaults over Oisin Van Gelderen who is on Proffitt's kit

Friday 05 Nov. No Wind! Paint Ball Day: North (Toughies) V South (Toffs).  

"You sweat your goolies off, you get bruised to death and if you do it in the sand dunes like we did, you work your butt off."

Russ: Girlies get body armour to protect their titties, but man boobs go raw!  After a good safety brief it's goggles down, line up on opposite sides and try to cross the flag which is in the middle, guns a blazing.

 

I went straight up the middle and got shot straight in the head (nice shot), but not a qualified kill.
I wasn't dead, so sneaked around the back of one of the enemy's strongholds and let em have it....nice!  Hand on your head and gun in the air tells every one you're dead and they can't touch you. But leave your hopper open (the bit on the gun with the paintballs in) and when you elevate your gun to tell everyone you're dead, all the balls fall out. Result: you get shot to bits when you go down to pick them up again, I can tell you.    

GAME 3 was bloody, all out carnage. The Toughies (northeners) scattered the Toffs(southerners) to the four walls. We then ran out of bullets (paint balls) so we captured the guns from the Toffs (cheers Lucy Robson) and killed em some more with their own guns, (sorry Lucy). 

Once we'd killed all the Toffs we turned on our own team and killed them as well: cool. 

One of the Toffs was infiltrated by a Jet Skier from the North called 'Bones' who looked like one of the actors from Bo Selecta, but I got him good I can tell you.  Screams of I'm dead, I'm dead, I'm dead were met with your dead, your deader, your real dead.

The biggest trouble with the game is the guns.  They make the same noise when they are empty as when they are loaded. The amount of head to heads I had with my empty gun versus a loaded one was bizarre, especially when the guy with the loaded weapon ended up running away!  I think that was Alex Trittan (he's French and a kitesurfer!). Mind you we were all dressed the same, so it was hard to see who was who and to determine who was or was not on your team. I think it's fair to say that everyone got a jolly good bruising.


First four men..



...and first four ladies



 

Russ's Conclusion
Russ: The judges were extremely encouraging and totally un-biased. The event was brilliantly run, very laid back and complemented by FREE lunches every day from the 'Tea Clipper' Cafe. The company was top banana and the sailing was great, and if you won, you event got paid. Dude!!

The National Wave Championships 2005 has been pencilled in for the 12-16 May. Let's hope the wind shows up proper so we can take out the Toffs on the water as well as in the Dunes!!! Congrats to Chris Audsley, Ruth Elliot, Chris Murray and Richard Jones.

As for the Masters Fleet........well there is only one Master:
Russell Tetlow, Rhosneigr Masters
Wave Champion 2004!

Ladies Report by Louise Emery

It seems to me in the Ladies fleet that port tack provides certain winners and starboard tack events provide others.
What was looking like the only day of wind
was blowing from the wrong way –
north-westerly, starboard tack. No!!!

"I always pray for
port tack and it being
Rhosneigr I thought I
wouldn’t have to pray
that much. Halleluia,
was I mistaken!"

The other problem for me was that the
conditions dictated that jumping would be
more important than wave riding and from the outset it was clear that if you could forward loop on starboard, you’d be in the final.

That put Ruth Elliot and Sonia Pavelin way ahead before the first flag went up. With that move in their handbags, they were quietly confident that a podium position was theirs.

But what about Triple Crown Champion
Charlie Connelly
, surely she would give
them a run for their money? Well it just
wasn’t Charlie's day. She looked tired after her week of tring to be “Extreme” on the Isle of White and managed to spend two heats searching for waves and ramps that just weren’t there. Both myself and Charlie lost in the first rounds so found ourselves up against each other for the last place in the final. I don’t beat Charlie that often, in fact this was my second time ever. But to be honest, it was a hollow victory as we both sailed rubbish and the judges had a job to decide who was the least worst.

So, no surprises that Ruth and Sonia looped their way to the final with Sonia looking the best in the waves. But also joining them was Camilla French. Camilla’s backloop attempts were impressive and although she didn’t land any, the judges always mark up ballsy moves in the women’s fleet, and she beat me fair and square. I thought it was real close between the two loopers. Ruth’s loops were a touch cleaner, but Sonia had much better wave rides. However, the local girl ruled and Ruth was absolutely ecstatic to win her first OUTDOOR National Title.(She is the UK Indoor champion)

As Charley and me sat on the beach watching the final we could only think one thing:

"We better learn to loop on both tacks by next season"

Fair play for those chicks raising the game.

     

1st place Chris Audsley on winning the event...

"Winning Rhosneigr came as a big surprise to me. Not because I did not think I was capable of winning, but because I had convinced myself that there would not be an event due to the bad forecast. On the one and only day of competition, the conditions were marginal but just enough to have a good, fair contest in the light onshore winds.

I was very pleased with my sailing. I pulled every back loop I tried and caught some good waves along with making a couple of taka's back on the wave. I have been waiting for an event with these conditions because I have been practicing taka's all summer and knew they would be the winning move because no one can make them consistently in the British fleet.

The whole event was great though. Dave from Funsport put on a decent event with good sponsorship from Boardseeker magazine. There was lots of joy food as well! I hope to go back next year to defend my title!"

1st place Chris Murray on the Youth event:

"The Youth and Junior events were held on the Saturday. The day started with planing conditions on a 5.4m sail with knee high waves. However, they ran the event in the afternoon and by then the wind had dropped, so they ran an expression session to get a result. In my first round I got some good waves and did tail first rides to impress the judges. I won that round and in my next heat I did a tack called a 'conker tack' which really impressed the judges. I won that round as well! In the last round the wind dropped even more and I lost to Darren Mitchell, but I had won overall. So I am the UK YOUTH WAVE SAILING CHAMPION which is brilliant! "

1st Place Ruth Elliot on the Ladies event:

“Fantastic, I'm really happy to win at my home beach and it makes me feel like all the hard work was worth it!. Also great to finally prove I can sail outdoors as well as in a swimming pool.  Great event and glad so many ladies turned out to compete”

 


16yr old Chris 'Muzza' Murray collecting his
prize



Competition organiser Dave Buckland with
the top 3 women of the event


Not another FREE dinner!

Results:    
     

Men's Pro Fleet.
1. Chris Audsley
2. John Skye
3. Phil Horrocks
4. Terry Luxton
5=Andy King
5= Matt Pearch
7=Steve Thorp
7=John Hibbard
7=Steve King
7=Oisin Van Gelderan
7=James Cox
7=Greg Martin
13=Clyde Waite
13=Jamie Hancock
13=Jon Metcalfe
13=Adrian Jones
13=Martin Francis
13=Gwilwym Williams
19=Andy Heighton Jackson
19=Dave Horrocks
19=Russell Tetlow

 

Ladies
1.Ruth Elliot
2.Sonia Pavelin
3.Camilla French
4.Louise Emery
5.Charlie Connelly
5.Caroline Radway
5.Lucy Robson

Youth
1.Chris Murray
2.Darren Mitchell

Junior
1.Richard Jones
2.Graham Woods
3.Charles Riach
4.Adam Lewis
5.Nick Seddon

Report by Features Editor, Clyde Waite . Photos by David Hancock and BoardseekerMAG.

     
   
   
   
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