Diary of a desperate windsurfer - the winter is upon us report

Holy macaroni Batman, winter has arrived with a ‘KERPOW!!!’. Gale force winds, pissing rain and some pretty reasonable little sets rolling in. Guess it’s time to break out the small board and sails.

Saturday 02nd October: raspberry ripple (cripple for all you non-cockney types)

Hmm, apparently falling off the climbing wall wasn’t completely cool with my back. It’s kinda embarrassing considering that I’m a chiropractor. My patients seem to find it amusing that I’m in worse shape than them. Fortunately I get free treatment and should be back on the water in no time, just in case you were worried. However, it did mean that I missed the awesome winds over the weekend; Avon Beach was looking jolly smashing with the sand bar throwing up some decent ramps and the wind blowing pretty hard. Andy King (aka Charley Dimmock) was out showing the locals how it should be down with numerous back loops and flakas - nice!

Saturday 09th October: City slickers

Thursday 21st October: Baltic

Went for a quick bimble in Poole harbour after work, which was nice. No I’m lying it was sodding freezing. Unfortunately, like its owner, my steamer isn’t quite what it used to be, it’s all getting a bit saggy. It’s one of those that you wrestle your way out of the neck seal jobs which have pretty much gone out of fashion apparently. So a new one it is (I just hate being unfashionable). So it would be much appreciated if a kindly wetsuit manufacturer would throw one of their fantabulous suits my way, I’ve always said those PSYCHO II’s look amazing Mr. O’Neill. No pressure though (I’m about a size 12).

Saturday 23rd October: Proper windy

I am rather prone to exaggeration on occasions such as, no luv that’s a good 10 inches and such like. However, this weekend was proper windy, about force 16 at least. I stood nervously on the edge of Sandbanks beach being sand blasted holding onto my 4.1m sail and shagged out F2 Air 255... I’m not sure whether I enjoyed the experience. I spent most of my time with my eyes closed trying not to crap myself and desperately trying to remember the gybing in chop article written by Peter Hart in Windsurf mag.

Sunday 24th October: Proper windy Part Deux: The Rematch

It was a touch windier than I expected when arriving at Sandbanks for the rematch. In a monumental miscalculation in the wind I’d packed my giganto 7.5m T’bird for the outing and recklessly tossed my small board by the wayside in favour of the aircraft carrier. Big mistake. It was 5.8m Naish Boxer weather when I got there and 5.0m when I got onto the water with my 5.4m and by the end of the session I was hooning around on a 4.4m. My 108l Tabou 3 style was doing its best to handle the conditions but was occasionally spitting me out with disgruntled distain.

Friday 29th October: Warning! Exercise can seriously damage your health.

The only problem now being that I feel stiffer than a pubescent male watching late night channel 5.

It has come to my attention that I’m pathetically unfit but, like all outdoor types, I can’t stand the gym. Lifting lumps of metal with juiced up meat heads really isn’t my cup of tea. However, circuit training with a cute instructor is a completely different matter. The only problem now being that I feel stiffer than a pubescent male watching late night channel 5. It’s been blowing a gale for the entire week and I’m stuck inside writing a journal article for school knowing full well that they’ll be no wind at the weekend. That’ll teach me for not writing it sooner, poo.

"In a monumental miscalculation in the wind I’d packed my giganto 7.5m T’bird for the outing and recklessly tossed my small board by the wayside in favour of the aircraft carrier"

"Holy macaroni Batman, winter has arrived with a ‘KERPOW!!!’"

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